The Last 12 Days of Sanity



Rating: R


On the First Day of Christmas...


Kaiba hated Christmas. He hated everything to do with the season, from shopping malls full of idiots out to grab the newest 'must have' toy for their obnoxious brats to the retailers who started decking the halls midnight All Hallow's Eve. He hated the snow that closed down the roads making his travel to work impossible--yes, he could work from home but that wasn't the damn point. And then there were the annoying and ridiculous traditions that came with this time of year. Decorating everything in those horrible colors of red and green, bells jingling everywhere you went, sending and receiving cards from people you didn't care enough to talk to all year long but suddenly remembered at Christmas. Oh, and best of all? Going out and spending your hard earned money for presents for the ungrateful bastards all in the name of good will, peace on earth and a bunch of other crap that no one spouted except for now.

If it weren't for Mokuba, he wouldn't even go out this time of year, preferring to stay inside away from everyone during the period lasting from November 1st to January 1st. If it weren't for Mokuba, none of this would have mattered. But again, there was Mokuba. Silly, childish, and extremely giddy Mokuba who was currently running around dressed up like an elf. Seto sighed looking over his brother, the things he did to ensure his brother could enjoy his childhood some days. "You are NOT going to school dressed like that."

"But big brother," his eyes already taking on that kicked puppy look that no one could resist, "I HAVE to. I'm an elf in our school Christmas pageant. You promised you'd come later and watch me, remember?"

Of course, how could he forget the traditional pageant where the kids dressed up in ridiculous outfits, paraded around singing songs off key in squeaky voices as their parents looked on as if it was the most perfect thing they'd ever seen. The last one Seto had been forced into participating in a few years back, before he had threatened the school board with their jobs if they every tried to put him in one again, had been a complete disaster. Especially when Mokuba caught him in the shower singing the damn songs. It took a new game system to get the brat to hand over the video tape, and after making sure it had been the only copy he was able to ground his brother. "No I didn't forget Mokuba, however if I remember correctly that isn't until tonight. So you're still not going to school dressed like that." He watched as the pout on his brother's face grew bigger, and simply shook his head at the boy. It wasn't going to work--this time. Mokuba turned stomping out the door. Seto could hear his steps as they softened upon the padding leading up the stairway and quietly laughed at his brother's attempts to make his footfalls louder as they were muffled by the carpet.

Ten minutes later, the boy was back downstairs waiting for Seto so they could be on their way. Ah school, another pleasantry during the holiday season, Seto thought to himself as he reached for his coat. "Mokuba, button up. You are not catching a cold after all we went through getting flu shots this year." School was a stupid place in, well, the first place, but it had taken a major turn for the worse. Giggly girls wasting time better spent getting an education so they could better themselves, worrying over what this boy or that would be getting them for Christmas; another group of morons who expected him to spend his money on them. Why should they matter to him any more at this time of year more than they did at any other? He didn't care to associate with them on an ordinary basis, why should the fact that some man, who was supposed to have been born on December the 25th over 2,000 years ago, change the way he acted toward them? Fucking sheep. Didn't they read their own religious texts? Anybody who actually took the time to read and study the stories would know better, that and the fact that historians proved Constantine had decided on the day to celebrate--it would be like Hallmark deciding August 1st would make a great day to celebrate something.

No, Seto did not just dislike Christmas; he hated it and everything to do with it. Opening the front door, Mokuba ran out onto the snow-coved lawn before stopping cold, causing Seto to nearly run into him. "Mokuba, what are you doing?"

Mokuba just pointed at a tree that sat next to Seto's car. Looking up Seto saw what appeared to be a pear tree in a large container, wrapped up in a red bow. Hanging from the tree was a small bird's cage and a card. Seto walked closer, looking for any other possible surprises that might lay in wait for someone getting too close to the odd gift. Seeing none, he quickly grabbed at the card ripping it off the cage thereby startling and upsetting the poor bird.

"Um, Seto isn't that a partridge?" Mokuba was watching it intently, as it tried to flap its wings and was unable to in the cramped cage. If it didn't stop soon it was going to hurt itself, but all the constriction seemed to do was piss it off even more.

"Mokuba how the hell would I know a partridge from a..." He read the card and then reread it, not for one moment believing the words. "Mokuba?" Getting the boy's attention away from the annoyed bird, he continued, "It's named Keith. And it's a partridge. In a pear tree." Seto quickly flipped out his cell phone, calling the head of security for the estate. "Send someone up here to remove this package, NOW. Then, fire whoever let it past the front gate." Ending the call, Seto walked around to the driver's side of his car and unlocked the door. "Get in, Mokuba."

All the way to school, Seto fumed over the audacity that someone had actually sent HIM that ridiculous thing. It hadn't helped that Mokuba thought it was cute, believing obviously that Seto had a secret admirer. Dropping Mokuba off, he drove furiously to his school. His mind wandered off his driving momentarily as the bird and tree came to the front of his thoughts and whoever had sent them. He still had the card, and would have the researchers at Kaiba Corp. look over it later to try and determine if they could figure out who had sent it. That's how he failed to see the car that was spinning out of control on his side of the road as it skidded across the ice-covered road. As he looked up, he forgot everything he'd ever learned about driving on icy surfaces and twisted the wheel hard. The next thing he saw was a complete whiteout between his airbag and the snow bank he'd landed in after he drove off the road.

There were voices outside; he could hear the muffled sounds of their calls as they franticly dug his car out of the snow. Finally the door flew open, for him to come face to face with his would be rescuers--Fuck it all. Honda and Jounouchi. His day couldn't get any fucking worse. "Lucky for you, we're were late getting to school today and happened to be behind you, Kaiba."

"Luck had nothing to do with it mutt." Kaiba stepped out of his car, brushing past the outstretched hands the boys held out in offering for him.

"Really? And just what would you have done if we hadn't come along moneybags? Froze to death?" Jounouchi stood there hands crossed over his chest obviously freezing himself as they were talking. "Ever hear of OnStar? Great company--I own stock." He flipped out his phone once again, calling for a car to come by and pick him up as soon as possible. Luckily-- and yes, this time he did agree it was luck, the car wouldn't be too long, as the driver had just taken it out for fuel.

"Yeah, well, we can rebury your sorry ass if you want." Honda held his friend back, but the look in his eyes said he agreed to help out if necessary and just maybe they'd leave Kaiba out of the car this time.

The limo pulled up almost immediately. The driver jumped out, and held the door open for Kaiba to step in. Looking back at the two friends who had, Kaiba admitted to himself, tried to help out even if he didn't need or want it, as they stood shivering in the cold, their hands near blue from digging the snow from around his car. "Get in." They both looked at Kaiba and then each other making sure they had heard the same thing. "Get in the car. Unless you want to stand out here and freeze to death? There would be two less idiots in the world."

Moving past Kaiba, they both climbed in although Jounouchi could be heard mumbling under his breath. Kaiba had to strain to hear him, but he could just make out a few of the words, "Fucking...Annoying...Sexy...Bastard..." Okay. Obviously he had heard the blond wrong, that or missed too many words between the ones he did hear, so Kaiba did what he preferred to do when dealing with Yugi Mouto or his cheerleading hang-ons, he ignored them. Damn, he really hated this time of year.



On the 12th day of Christmas my true love sent to me:
12 drummers drumming
11 pipers piping
10 lords a leaping'
9 ladies dancing
8 maids a milking'
7 swans a swimming'
6 geese a laying'
5 golden rings
4 calling birds
3 French hens
2 turtledoves
And a Partridge in a pear tree.




A/N:  I warned you about the use of Christmas songs! And if you caught the Partridge reference--you're old.  August 1st = Friendship Day and Sister's Day according the Official 2004 Hallmark Calendar.

 


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